I really wish I could get to the point that I can see my sucesses instead of seeing the failures. I think that is part of growing up, gaining confidence, and becoming used to the new me. But, its a part that I continue to struggle with. More on this later...
As I posted before, my husband has taken up running in the last few months and he runs about 3-4 miles 4-5 times per week. He decided last night that he wanted to try and run a half marathon without doing any of the training for it. I guess part of me is jealous. Everything just comes so easy to him. Of course without training he ran a 2:30 which is a time I will probably never see! I do love that man, but its not fair. And of course I am jealous that he doesnt have the medical ailments that I do (he has a colon, he doesnt have asthma, etc). But ... I am still proud of him all the same.
So husband and I take off ... at 6:15am. I am not happy about this because I specifically said 6am ... and he specifically blew off my time saying "I dont wanna stand outside forever." Well we barely made the start line and no one had time to use the bathroom. Apparently he had to pee for the whole race ... so after the race he told me "we will make sure to get to the races early in the future." LOL, he didnt admit I was right ... but close enough!
The race started and I was feeling strong. I noticed right away that I had lined up too far back, and that there really werent any runners around me. The field thinned out quickly and I settled into a pace. At mile 3 I realized that was the fastest 3 miles I had ever run. I tried to pull it back ... but didnt really have alot of success doing that. At mile 6.2 I realized I just PR'd my 10K and I again tried to pull it back. I REALLY need to do a better job pacing myself.
At mile 9 I just crashed ... I could not make myself run. The super duper extra walk breaks started and I was walking more than I was running. The race seemed endless. This really upset me because usually at this point in a race I am feeling great! Mile 10 I tried to pick it back up, but then mile 11 I crashed again. I struggled to even move foreward.
Mile 12 I turned the corner and headed for home. The road seemed just endless. I was trying to hold on the best that I could. I was slowing down ... slower and slower. I was doing everything I could to keep going ... one foot in front of another. The bridge was at mile 12.8 and I walked up the bridge but promised myself I would run down the bridge.
I ran ... and ran and ran ... last year I ran it out from the bridge but this year I just couldnt do it. I had to walk for a few seconds before the big sprint to the finish line. As I was approaching the finish line I thought I saw some friends holding signs, and through my dehydrated daze I remember thinking "oh those arent for me!"
I prepared for my sprint in. I set my sights on two walkers that had been ahead of me the whole race and I started to close the gap -- and yes beat them at the end. I crossed the finish line exhausted. And that was when I realized I had my own cheering squad. My husband was standing there with my good friend 42hockeymom (Lisa) and her daughter. And yes... the signs were for me.
There were 2 signs
#1 made by her daughter said: AnnMarie sweat is the new black
#2 made by my friend said: I can because I can (the Team Opus slogan) with a picture of a penguin and on the bottom it said "Inspiring since 2011"
I literally cried at the finish line! I have never had signs for me ... or any friends who were not running the race who cared enough to come and see my finish... I am truly touched and blessed!
Now the time ... my goal was to break the 3:10 barrier. And up until mile 10 I was perfectly on pace to break that. My next goal was to PR ... and I missed it by 14 seconds.
Now the struggle -- half of me is proud of myself. This was the second fastest half marathon I have ever run ... and the other half of me is devastated that I did not break my PR dangit. If I would have just taken a few less walk breaks I would have had it. My pacing was terrible though -- and in the end that is the what hurt me the most.
But I guess I have to be happy with it. It was truly my best ... apparently I am enough to inspire others even if I didnt PR! And ... I did beat last years time by 4 1/2 minutes!